Two days ago, I pulled hot, perfectly rounded golden cupcakes from the oven. Cai gasped when he saw them! He said, "Oh, mommy! You are the BEST baker! Look at those cupcakes! Good job, Mommy!" As I placed them on the oven top, I realized how special it can be to bake together, and what a sweet little encourager Cai is. I didn't have the heart to tell him, they were just boxed cupcakes mixed up from Aldi. To him, they were the best thing in the whole world and I was the best mommy in the whole world.
I truly savored that moment of seeing freshly baked cupcakes from a child's eyes, because I know our sweet son won't always think Hart and I are the coolest parents in the world (with mad cupcake baking skillz)! It's these moments that re-affirm why we've worked it out that I can stay home most of the time with the children! I really love it (most days!) ha!
Sweet B is 1 year old today! We've had her for 4 months now! We celebrated her 1st birthday "bumble B" style, because she is one "busy B"!
My heart couldn't stand all the joy, nor her cuteness factor in polka dots and a yellow tutu! Jeez louise, if I had ever dreamed of having my daughter's 1st birthday party, I seriously could not have picked anything better!
"B turned this kitchen stool into a walker. haha!"
B challenges me daily. She's sweet and spunky (already taking up to 6 steps at a time!), has way too much baggage for a baby her size, but at the same time thrives and strives through it all with a perseverance and determination I admire! Fostering/all that entails drives me crazy! But, just when I feel at a low in it, God encourages my heart to keep going. I know this little girl is part of us. God is working out a larger greater story. I praise him for that! I can't mention details about her case online, but I can say I had some encouragement that (maybe... key word... maybe) we could end up with this little girl eventually. Anything can happen at this point in her life and story, and I don't want to assume we will be her forever family, but how wonderful would that be if God gave us her forever? While I struggle on our fussiest days, on days that never seem to end, on days when my heart sort of wishes I didn't have, yet 1 more fussy child to take care of, I know that God is weaving her into my heart in a beautiful way. How that will end, I can't say, but I do know that God is the master weaver, and by His hands he is making one beautiful tapestry of our lives. Yesterday a follower of mine on Instagram, left me this, beautiful comment:
But, "if I did not love each baby/child, from the minute I touch him/her, as if they are my own, with total abandon, with my whole heart and soul, God would not have called me into this ministry. These children don't need another mother who is detached; they have already experienced loss. They need a mother who will throw open her heart, throw open her arms, and embrace them with a love that changes everyone and everything it touches." (The Middle Mom)
Praying today that I can and will throw open my heart to Love the Lord my God this way, so then I can be poured out again and again to those around me!
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