Mothering brings me to the end of myself most days. I believe it was designed by God for this very reason. All day long, I am meeting someone else's needs. All day long I pour myself out to my children serving them, caring for them, loving them. Not always with the greatest attitude, but in some way or another I've found that by loving and cherishing them, I am most fulfilled.
Giving of yourself, God pours in more to you.
As I was texting with some friends, I realized that my calling as a mom reaches further than my own children. This truly is a unique calling that I'm finding rare and beautiful, difficult, and fulfilling.
While I love deeply for Cai and love longingly to meet Judah, they are not the only ones I am called to love.
I am a foster mom, and more and more God is showing me what that means.
Sometimes it means saying, "No" when DSS calls and asks you to take a 2 year old, only to heartbreakingly find out, he was then sent to a group home.
Sometimes it means saying "Yes" when DSS calls and you suddenly are pulling out your pac n play, climbing through your attic, hurriedly washing newborn clothing, and carrying that sweet babe all over your friend's neighborhood trick or treating.
The saying "yes" is tricky though. We don't always say yes. Saying yes means more exhaustion, more drama, less quiet, less time for myself, my husband, my kids.
And yet, every time I find it has been worth it.
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