Cai's Time

I think one of the hardest thing about adopting is that there are so many unknowns that make you truly have to completely rely on God. Why again is that so hard?!

Most people ask this question, "Do you know what kind of baby you will get?"

Um, no. (I never know how to answer this one... um... hopefully a good one?! Jk)

"Do you know what age baby you will get?" 

Um, no. Under Micaiah's age.

I won't lie. I do have newborn fever. Those precious little things that I want to hold in my hands right this minute. But then, we may get a rambunctious toddler, too. It's kind of hard to know, but I'm thankful God knows and it will be just right for our family.

One thing that I know for certain is that right now this is Cai's Time. I don't know how long it will last, but for some reason God knew that Micaiah needed these 2-3 years with just me one-on-one during the day.

 There are times when I'm busy doing something else, that Cai will come and just get right in my lap or stick a marker in my hand telling me he wants to write or he comes up with a book that we have to read "right then!" or after a long tiring day, he falls asleep while I'm rocking him and singing his songs and suddenly time opens up and we are there together, just the two of us and I won't give that up, even for a moment! This is our time and I love it.

It's funny, but even though I am happy things are moving along with our adoption, I truly feel so content with whatever timeline God has for us, because I know that this time with just Cai won't last forever and no matter how I like it, my time will be divided.

God is good. All the time.