How Can I Really be Thankful?

This idea of thankfulness is hard. Its not something that comes naturally to me. Every morning I battle with how I am going to walk throughout my day and way too often I walk in the flesh. We stayed up late watching the baseball game last night, so this morning I was cranky and tired and didn't start my day well.

Feelings of discontentment surged through me. My husband pointed to My List that I started yesterday and I wanted to stick my tongue out at him! I don't WANT to be thankful! I waved to him goodbye and walked back in the house. I put away the last of the tuperware sitting on the counter and knew I had to read my Bible.

I started reading through Philippians asking myself How can I really be thankful, especially when I don't want to be?

This is what God revealed to me.

The thanks-giving is hard when you compare and believe Satan's lies. Instead of being the person that takes every opportunity to look for the good in that situation, you reel back and are not filled with joy. You are filled with darkness and bitterness that what you have is second best. You believe that if you were really loved your lot would be different. Better. What someone else has.

Is it really about what you have that makes you happy? No, it's about the joy that you find in what has already been given.

I read Philippians 1:11 and got stuck right there.

"filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God."

The first thing I thought of was Homemade apple pie filled with sweet gooey goodness. So full that it flows out of the intricate lattice on top. I know at my Aunt's house at Christmas, we slice a piece and it just pours out the sides onto the plate.

That's the joy I want. I want overflowing joy, the sweet goodness of Jesus' righteousness so full in me that it cannot be contained. It comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God. My response to being filled so full is praise. Praise to God.

Hart prayed for me that the weeds and roots of bitterness would be dug out so that the real fruit could grow, and I prayed that again for myself.

Lord, dig out the ugly in my heart and fill me with your righteousness!